Defiled

"Hear and understand: Not what goes into the mouth defiles a man; but what comes out of the mouth, this defiles a man... But those things which proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and they defile a man. For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies." Matthew 15:11, 18-19

Last night, my husband was reading some stories about heaven and the account he read included rollercoasters and movies. Our whole marriage he has struggled with my enjoyment of both, and I have always believed that there was something about them that reminded me of God. So, I know it is odd, but this has been a six and a half year argument, and last night my sweet husband tried to say sorry!

How nice right? Well guess what I assumed? The worst. I accused him of being sarcastic and not meaning it. Here he was, apologizing for years of putting me down, and I thought he was still doing it. What does my accusation say about my heart?

Jesus says that the words that come out of our mouths come from our hearts and defile us, I believe they also cause harm to those around us. I have now created an atmosphere for my husband to feel unsafe to humble himself and say sorry.

The words that came out of my mouth are also so normal. It seems that it comes so naturally to see the worst, rather than to see the best. What if I chose to expect good things from those I love? From even strangers? I need to begin to rid myself of criticism. How does this begin?

Titus 1:15 says, "To the pure all things are pure, but to those who are defiled and unbelieving nothing is pure; but even their mind and conscience are defiled."

I need to ask to be made pure. I cannot do this on my own. I must take ownership of my weakness and allow Christ to show off His strength within me.